Things Will Ferrell Hasn’t Died Of

A freak paragliding accident

Eating too many hotdogs (Though he didn’t know what he was thinking when he ate five of them)

A drug overdose

Drowing in the smells of rich mahogany (would also accept “being crushed by many leatherbound books”)

Killed by a mugging, supermodel impersonating Ben Stiller

Killed by angry athletes wishing not to be cheered on

Being in a bad movie remake of a TV show with Nicole Kidman

Too much cowbell