(I almost forgot, this went up today)

Just Another Reason Why AOL is Losing 300 Customers Per Hour

mikeschramm: umm who are you

MovieFone: Hi there. I’m the new MovieFone bot! I can find movies for you anywhere in the country in a fraction of second. All you have to do is give me part of the title, an actor or director’s name. I can also send you alerts when your favorite films are opening. Type privacy anytime to review the policy. Type any movie you want to see or menu to get going.

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: do i know you?

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -P- Me and You and Everyone We Know
2 -P- Without You I’m Nothing

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: what is this, really?

MovieFone: Mm hm, now we are getting somwhere.

mikeschramm: no, really why is this on my list?

MovieFone: Yes.

mikeschramm: yes is not a valid answer to that question

MovieFone: Mm hm.

mikeschramm: so, can you like get off my buddy list

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -P- Heaven Can Wait
2 -P- The Greatest Game Ever Played
3 -N- Get Rich or Die Tryin’
4 -P- Just Like Heaven
5 -P- Without You I’m Nothing
6 -P- The Thing About My Folks
7 -P- The Beat That My Heart Skipped (De Battre mon coeur s’est arrete)
8 -P- Me and You and Everyone We Know

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: right now

MovieFone: Enter a valid 5 digit zip-code.

mikeschramm: don’t want to

MovieFone: Not valid 5 digit zipcode. Would you like to try again?

Y – Yes
N – No

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: no

MovieFone: Main Menu
Select a number or just ask me about any film, actor or director and I’ll search for you.

1 – Find Movies Now
2 – Set Up Movie Alerts
3 – The First 5
4 – New Releases
5 – Games

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: like i care

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -F- Crazy Like a Fox
2 -P- Just Like Heaven
3 -P- I Am Cuba
4 -F- I am Charlotte Simmons
5 -F- I Am Legend (2006)
6 -F- I Am Cuba, The Siberian Mammoth
7 -F- The Air I Breathe
8 -F- Awesome: I F*ckin’ Shot That
9 -P- I Know Where I’m Going
10 -S- The Kid & I
11 -P- How I Won the War (1967)
12 -F- Singing Behind Screens (Cantando dietro i paraventi)
13 -P- I Went to the Dance
14 -P- I am a Sex Addict

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: tell aol or whoever that I’m not interested in having you on my list

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -F- How to Tell He’s Not the One in 10 Days
2 -F- Awesome: I F*ckin’ Shot That
3 -F- I’m Not There: Suppositions on a Film Concerning Dylan
4 -P- Not on the Lips (2003)
5 -P- The Beat That My Heart Skipped (De Battre mon coeur s’est arrete)

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: and if they don’t like that, I’ll go to yahoo

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -F- Awesome: I F*ckin’ Shot That
2 -P- T- Rex: Back to the Cretaceous in IMAX 3D

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: and if yahoo does the same thing, I’ll just go to jabber

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -P- The Thing About My Folks
2 -P- Just Like Heaven
3 -P- Brother to Brother
4 -P- The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
5 -P- The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
6 -P- The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
7 -P- End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones
8 -P- The Kid Stays in the Picture
9 -P- The Squid and the Whale
10 -P- The End of the Affair
11 -P- Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future

mikeschramm: oh hey wallace and gromit!

MovieFone: Hey there. Just ask type a film name, actor or director any time and I’ll tell you what’s playing.

mikeschramm: wallace and gromit

MovieFone: Enter a valid 5 digit zip-code.

mikeschramm: don’t want to, dork

MovieFone: Not valid 5 digit zipcode. Would you like to try again?

Y – Yes
N – No

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: sorry, got distracted by wallace and gromit.

MovieFone: Not valid 5 digit zipcode. Would you like to try again?

Y – Yes
N – No

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: in conclusion, if i want these bots on my list, i’ll put them on

MovieFone: Not valid 5 digit zipcode. Would you like to try again?

Y – Yes
N – No

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: and if you’re telling me that the price of using aim will be to hear from these bots every day, then it’s too high a price to pay

MovieFone: Not valid 5 digit zipcode. Would you like to try again?

Y – Yes
N – No

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: no, and bug off

MovieFone: Main Menu
Select a number or just ask me about any film, actor or director and I’ll search for you.

1 – Find Movies Now
2 – Set Up Movie Alerts
3 – The First 5
4 – New Releases
5 – Games

======= Movie of the Week =======
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire – Movie Site

mikeschramm: now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go find a place to download admium, or some other program that doesn’t succumb to AOL’s terrible will

MovieFone:
- Movies for Today
1 -F- You Want Me to Kill Him?
2 -S- Be Here To Love Me: A Film About Townes Van Zandt
3 -P- I Went to the Dance
4 -F- Find Me Guilty
5 -P- A Farewell To Arms
6 -F- You, Me and Dupree
7 -F- Imagine Me and You

Type # next to movie to see showtimes, M to go back to the Main Menu or anything else to search again.

P=Past, N=New, S=Soon, F=Future