Debate over evolution shuts down IMAX film because the film (about underwater volcanoes) presents the theory that life evolved from multicelled organisms that live in underwater hot vents.

Spiderman: Man evolves into Spiderman.

The Blob: Blob evolves into bigger Blob thing, that evolves into even bigger Blob-type thing. That eats people, and that’s un-Christian, too.

ET: Strange, mysterious alien evolves into boy’s best friend.

The Usual Suspects: Seemingly unthreatening disabled thief evolves into evil, completely healthy crime boss.

Alien: Gooey outer space pods evolve into slick-H.R. Giger-designed acidblood monsters. That eat people.

The Wizard of Oz: Presumably regular monkeys evolve into evil monkeys with wings. Also, I’m not sure where those Munchkins came from, but it was probably evolution. Or magic. Either way, ban it!

Braveheart: Peasant countryman evolves into blue-painted leader of men. Scottish ones, too.

The Matrix: Someone as lame as Bill evolves into someone as cool as Neo. Whoah.

Gigli: Somewhat hot double threat actress/singer (she did work with Stephen Soderberg) evolves into intolerable diva who crashes movies into the ground. And eats people. Probably.