I have to go grocery shopping, and I’ve had to do so for about a week.

I don’t know why I always seem to put it off. I like wandering the aisles of the grocery store, taking in all the colors and words and messages and deciding what to buy and what would be obscene for me to eat by myself and what’s cheap and what I will buy only because it’s funny. I enjoy the rickety carts whose wheels turn every which way but forward, and that little child seat that folds out, and the fact that someone somewhere decided it would be a good idea to put advertising on the inside front panel of the cart. I don’t think that’s ever worked with me.

(Though I look forward to the day when someone decides that should be a video screen. Imagine the accidents! Cleanup on aisle 6!)

But for some reason I always put off going. “I have food,” I think. “There’s that chicken that’s been frozen in the fridge for months, and that can of stuff that I’ve had sitting back in the pantry because I since decided I don’t like the taste of it. I’ve got gobs of those 25 cent noodles left, though I don’t really want to eat them because that would mean I’d have eaten them for a week. And then there’s all that shredded cheese.” I bought tons of the stuff hoping to make quesadillas, but it turns out I didn’t have enough tortillas. I have the same problem with cheese for sandwiches. Either I buy too much bread, so I’m sitting around with sandwich insides and no bread, or the other way around.

I try to give myself little incentives to go. If I go, I promise myself, we can stop by that Blockbuster near there, and pick up that video you wanted. Or we can run by the Gamestop and see what’s new, maybe finally pick up Prince of Persia (which I’ve wanted to play for years but never bought).

But then I decide that I don’t need to spend the money. Or that I’ve got enough movies at home. Or that I don’t need to go.

And I end up sitting at home eating cheese melted over ramen. Or the can of stuff from the pantry that tastes bad.

And I swear to myself, tomorrow. Tomorrow. I’ll go to the grocery store tomorrow.