And now it’s time once again for FarmVille Wednesday, in which I talk what’s interested me in the past week of my favoritest MMO ever, FARMVILLE. Omg I love clicking.

• Spring fever is underway! Everyone’s collecting eggs for their spring basket in hopes of picking up a chick or something else that’s cool from a Mystery Egg. I don’t have too many friends, so I’m still stuck at “Empty,” but I’m hoping to do a lot better on this run than I did on the St. Patrick’s Day event where you had to try and earn gold from everyone. I’m totally going for that Mystery Egg!
• But I’m not nearly as excited about Spring as I am about the three features it seems like they’ve been teasing forever on the login screen — pets, co-op farming, and the farmer’s marketplace. All three of those got a little more outlined in Monday’s official podcast. FarmVille is already kind of co-op in a way, but I think bringing in a little more meaningful interaction will really push the game up to the next level in terms of fun (which means, it’ll actually be a little fun). Especially when you look at what Ngmoco is doing with We Rule (players in that game can actually own businesses and sell orders off to their friends), FarmVille could use a little more direct interactivity to counterweigh all of the clicking.
• Personally, I’ve just restarted in terms of what I’m growing. For a long time, I figured that since I was always near a computer, I should go short term, big profit, and I planted a lot of strawberries and soybeans. But lately, I feel like it’s more worth it to go in on the long term, and decided to do some mass-planting of longer crops like artichokes (and even pineapples, just for the heck of it). After the last harvest, however, I think I’m going to remake the farm — I’ve got a sizeable pocket build up at this point, and I think I might redesign my farm. The original design focused a lot on personal choices (like spelling out crops in the shape of my name), but I think in the future, I might go a little more traditional, which should make it easier for me to go through and harvest quickly.
• You may have heard that a European councilman lost his job due to playing FarmVille too much during council meetings. I’ll take the same line I always have on this one: if playing FarmVille too much is costing you your job, it’s time to stop playing FarmVille. After all, how else will you make some real money which you can then pour back into the game as FarmVille bucks? It’s very, very important to keep your job going — even if you have to let those crops wither occasionally, a steady paycheck, which you can then directly turn over to Zynga, is extremely important. Family relationships on the other hand, not so much. Your Shamrock Sheep will always love you — can you say the same about your wife? Didn’t think so.
• I’ve seen some cool crafts lately, too: While this FarmVille kitty is probably a little too girly for me, I really like this black sheep and this pig sculpture (the second especially considering my pig-purchasing spree last week). But my favorite is this moo art — I’d like to hang that on my wall.

That’s it for this week. Stay tuned next week — hopefully by then my Horse Stable will be built, and I can tell you all about how I did it!

I’m about to sit down and watch one of my favorite TV shows, 24, which last week Fox confirmed was going to be done for at the end of this season.

I’m actually ok with the decision — I still love the show, but I think both the show and its main character (Jack Bauer, who will be up there with Batman as one of my favorite fictional characters of all time) have done pretty much all they can. For all of the political bluster and hype (the show made a few headlines for Jack’s tendency to torture terrorists for information, at a time when torturing terrorists became frighteningly close to, if not actually, legal), the core of the show is really a Greek tragedy, and I think that the story is about wrapped up anyway.

Perhaps I should explain.

If you’ve never seen the show, I highly recommend you at least watch season one. Fans of the show each have their own favorite seasons — season two is mostly singled out as the worst season (one of the characters went on the run against cougars in an infamously bad attempt to spice up the suspense), and I personally like season five a lot — but season one, pretty much everyone agrees, is the quintessential 24 story. Jack Bauer is working at CTU (Counter Terrorist Unit) when he and his family are taken off guard one evening, and he has 24 hours to fight terrorists and save the world.

The basic premise of the show is that Jack Bauer is the most awesome counter-terrorism agent of all time. Nothing kills him, nothing stops him, and even though again and again and again and again, he’s forced to do the impossible with no time and no tools at his disposal, he usually pulls it off. And the creators of 24 are very good (and to their credit, have been very good the whole time) at ratcheting up that suspense, sometimes in multiple stories. The show itself takes place in real-time — each episode is an hour of the story, and each season is 24 hours — and it’s that ticking clock that really ties everything together. Sometimes the premise pushes things into the silly, like when it takes Jack Bauer 10 minutes to drive across Los Angeles (I’ve lived here for almost eight months now, and sometimes it takes me 15 minutes to go across my street), or when characters continually get thrown into situations just to keep the plot moving. Another common joke among fans is what Jack Bauer must think by now, having gone through eight different days at different times of his life, all of them packed to the brim with much more than any actual living human being could handle. This is a guy who doesn’t even work for CTU any more, and yet gets tortured at six in the morning, finds the time to live through a nuclear blast at 5pm, and then wins a fistfight against an agency mole at midnight. He gets in shootouts hourly at this point — he’s a hero.

And yet he’s a flawed hero, because, without spoiling the story, his crazy life has cost him. Jack’s tried to quit his job multiple times, and yet each season, something finds a way to pull him back into the action. His family and his relationships have suffered — if the person he’s dating hasn’t turned out to be a mole or a plant, then their sibling or parents usually are, or their son gets into trouble with someone who is.

And it’s wearing on him — in the promo for this last season, he jokes with his granddaughter that “you’re supposed to call me Grandpa.” And indeed, as season eight has pushed on, signs keep appearing that Jack is past his prime. Oh, he’s still superhuman — he still takes down terrorists with ease, and he’s still always, always right about that suitcase being a bomb, or that person lying, or the terrorists playing two parties off against each other.

But while the early secondary characters in the series were usually incompetent or traitorous, they’re now starting to be right as well. Not in the always-right way that Jack is (like Batman, he never, ever goes the weak route or bothers to compromise), but in a way that they’re kind of right, too. Things in Jack’s world are changing, and the real tragedy of 24, the real finale, may be that for all of Jack’s hard work and suffering and sacrifice, he may not have changed the world at all.

Of course, I don’t know how the show will actually end. In a way, though I will be sad that there’s not a new 24 on every week during the seasons, I’m kind of glad to see them call it quits. Every story needs a worthwhile ending, and I expect a good one from 24. Jack needs to finally, once and for all, have saved the world. There’s a rumor that he’ll die, and there’s even a rumor that they’ll do a movie (though I actually hope that doesn’t happen — not only are they suggesting that they won’t do it in real-time, which seems blasphemous for 24, but don’t we all remember the mess that Serenity was? That show really needed to go on, and yet the movie was still a mistake. I did like the TV movie that 24 put together, but it was really just another episode, not what they’re talking about in terms of a movie).

But no matter what, Jack’s story deserves an ending. I have my doubts that it’ll be happy — this show never really ends on a good note for the characters involved, even if the 24 universe (which is actually a few years ahead of ours, thus explaining some of the surveillance technology that we don’t happen to have in general usage yet) is still intact and running. So end away, 24. And no matter how many more members of CTU turn out to be moles, or how many times Jack gets shot in the arm and lifts something an hour later without wincing, I’ll still be watching.

As with that, I’m off to watch the show. Forgive me for hurrying — we’re running out of time!

Update: Just saw this week’s show (and the promo at the end for next week) — they are already pushing the finale hard. I can’t wait. I’m not sure how much of the show has actually been shot so far (I seem to recall they shoot about six weeks ahead, which means the last four will have been done with the knowledge that the show is ending), but I reckon it’ll be a nice finale. Not quite as epic as Lost, but I’m looking forward to it.

Sorry guys — had a long day and I need to play some video games, so rather than writing something here, I’m off to play Final Fantasy XIII.

I’m about three hours in — I like it so far, but it is kind of a bummer how much they streamlined it. I haven’t gotten all of the different strategy parts (like paradigms) “unlocked” yet, so I’m not really feeling the whole depth of the game. Still, I like it — all of the naysayers are right about some of the things they’re saying, but they forget one thing: it’s Final Fantasy. I haven’t played a Final Fantasy game since X, so it’s been years since I saw that gloved hand in the menus and heard and seen a JRPG like this one.

In fact, the J may be the most important part of how this game is being received — it’s a very, very Japanese game, and it’s always been a pretty Japanese series. Back when Final Fantasy VII ruled the world, Japan was the center of video games — they were turning out the brightest and the best, Sony sold the most popular console around, and the most popular American developers were still making games for the PC. Nowadays, though — well, Nintendo actually sells the most popular console. But the most popular games are created and sold by American developers, and Japan is sort of playing catch-up behind some really interesting game ideas from American design schools and European game designers.

It’s weird to think of Final Fantasy as an underdog, but it kind of is — the JRPG is almost an extinct animal at this point, and clearly Square Enix feels they have to streamline to reach a mass audience. The irony, of course, is that they probably don’t. Video gaming might need to progress, with motion controllers and 3D and so on, to make more money, but JRPGs really don’t. People are more than happy to play the same old 100-hour ATB games that they’ve always played, given that they’re created with love and care. Sooner or later, I hope some upstart developer comes along and realizes that. I think the next big Final Fantasy-style game won’t even be called Final Fantasy.

And look, you got me to write something anyway. I’m off to play.

PS. Lightning is a badass. I wonder if she’s a mom, because, y’know, “moms are tough.” Also, this is great.

Time once again for Warcraft Wednesday, a weekly recounting of what I’ve found interesting in the World of Warcraft this past week.

• I’ve actually been playing the game more lately — as you may have heard (both here and on Tipoaa), I have come up with a goal to works towards in the game, and that’s got me going. I’m going to become a Guardian of Cenarius, which will require me to grind out two reputations. I’m more than halfway through Revered on Cenarion Circle after just a few days of grinding on Encrypted Twilight Texts, and I am pretty sure that I won’t have too big a problem with Cenarion Expedition rep either (though I haven’t really researched it fully yet — I seem to recall it requires running Steam Vaults a lot, which is something I’ve already done quite a bit of). This title will be a big achievement for me, though — this character, my Hunter, has always been on Cenarius even when I’ve played other servers, so to have it pick up the Guardian of Cenarius title is pretty meaningful. Should be fun.
• After that, I don’t know what I’ll do, but I did notice while playing this week that I’d somehow picked up enough money to get epic flying for my Pally, so I bought that last night. He’s riding around on a regular Flying Machine right now, but I brought up Engineering specifically so he could make both the epic flying machine and the motorcycle, so I’ll probably have him do both of those. By then, Cataclysm will have likely reared its ugly head in some way. If that doesn’t get me interested in the game, maybe then I’ll finally call it quits.
• Speaking of calling it quits, Brigwyn has. And even though he’s happy about it, it’s just another closing. Sure, there are new folks coming up in the community, and people are still blogging about the game, but I think it’s safe to say that World of Warcraft has officially peaked. There’s still a chance that Cataclysm brings back a big audience, but I really, really doubt that anything else with the name “World of Warcraft” on it will entice as many people as it has in the past — even if the Cataclysm content is the best they’ve ever done, there are some people who won’t even bother just because they’re done with the game. We’ll see — I could eat my words on that if Blizzard puts out a press release boasting 12 million players a month after Cataclysm, and I have no doubt that the expansion will top PC sales charts, but I think we’ve entered the late afternoon of this current day in Azeroth.
• I will admit I was wrong about something else: looks like a brand new company is taking over the WoW TCG. I did say a little while back that I didn’t think Blizzard would pursue anything new with the TCG, but of course I didn’t know there was going to be a TCG company run by ex-Blizzard guys. We’ll have to see how that works out — they do say that everything that’s currently in print is coming back out, but what’s more interesting will be to see what kinds of changes they make. I assume that whatever Cryptozoic does going forward will be exactly what Blizzard wished Upper Deck had done from the beginning. On a unrelated note, Blizzard Entertainment’s logo looks almost exactly like Cryptozoic Entertainment’s logo. Just saying.
• Haiku is overdone on the Internet these days, but I really liked these Hunter Pet Haiku.
• I agree — changing out these tokens was (and will be — I have other characters to do it on) a pain. Blizzard should have done it automatically — “We’ve exchanged your tokens for X honor” or whatever the actual exchange rate is.
• This is interesting. I keep hearing about people who are playing the AH like crazy lately, but every time I sit down to do it, I just lose interest. It’s not that it’s hard — all you have to do is foresee which items will or are doing well, and then make sure you’re on top of that market. But I just can’t get into it for some reason. Maybe I’m just not that into numbers. I’d almost rather go out into the world and get some really pricey ore to sell rather than sit on the AH and track prices for the same amount of time.
• Finally THIS IS ADORABLE.

That’s it for now. Off to grind some rep. And actually, I just realized that I haven’t gotten my Pug yet. I thought I’d run enough instances, too… Hmmm.

Everyone and their brother is doing Formspring, but I don’t need no stinking social networking wannabe to answer questions people have about me. I just ask people to send questions to me on Twitter or Facebook and then I answer them here. Easy as pie.

Not a ton of questions tonight, which is fine — I have to go watch Lost in just a bit.

@preden2 asks, “If you could get ANY guest for a Tipoaa show, who would you choose?”

I’ve been thinking about this quite a bit lately — I think we have a pretty nice opportunity on the new podcast to bring some really interesting people on from all walks of life, but on the other hand, the show is really a lot of inside jokes between Turpster and I, so it wouldn’t really be right to invite somebody like Greg Grunberg on (he and I are Twitter buddies, you know) and then laugh about fahjords and “how’s it going chat channel.” Given that those things are funny, of course, but it’s a fine line.

So I don’t know. Turpster and I will definitely invite on our buddies, and I’m hoping to bring in some new voices — some people we know who don’t necessarily play WoW, but would be really funny on a podcast. You’ll see — I guarantee we’ll have some new folks on very soon.

As for a pie in the sky kind of thing, I’d love to have someone like Patton Oswalt or Kristen Bell on — someone who’s really legitimately talented and funny. But I think the size and form of the show as it is right now (which is the way we want it, really) wouldn’t attract someone like that. Unless we happen to have some connection to them somehow. You never know — I’m meeting all sorts of people here in LA. In six months, maybe I will have Patton Oswalt’s number.

Speaking of talented, @maryvarn asks, “Nintendo 3DS: Gimmicky or Awesome?”

I’m happy to say that I got to break the news last night about Nintendo’s new handheld console on Joystiq — at the time, I was worried out of my mind that it was a hoax or a joke or that it was actually an old rumor or something, but no, turns out that they really did announce a new handheld, due out by this time next year, that will allow for 3D gaming without any sort of special glasses. There’s a few funny things here — first, I think it’s hilarious that they have announced a new version of the console just days before the DSi XL is set to release in the states — that’s like Apple announcing an iPad 2 right now before the first iPad actually gets to stores. Either Nintendo is really worried about the DSi XL (and want to make sure that low sales don’t freak out their investors), or they’re not worried at all, and expect that people will buy it anyway, even though it’ll be obsolete in less than a year.

But about the console itself, I think it’s closer to awesome than gimmicky. Obviously I haven’t seen it yet (there are no official pictures out there), and we have no idea what kinds of games will be on it. We don’t even really know what the technology is — will it be some sort of head-tracking software running through the camera that changes the screen based on where your head is, or will it be this “parallax” technology that pushes two different views to different areas in front of the screen? Or will it just be an accelerometer that changes the view based on how it’s tilted? We have no idea.

So there’s always the chance that Nintendo could jump the gun and screw it up (Virtual Boy), but I don’t think they will — remember than when the DS came out, everyone thought it was gimmicky, and now it’s the biggest handheld around. And remember that when the Wii came out, everyone thought it was a joke, and now Microsoft and Sony are scrambling to release motion controls. In other words, I wouldn’t bet against Nintendo — they’re a company that knows their trends, and it certainly seems like 3D is where gaming (and most of multimedia) is going. Plus, they’re exactly right — the most frustrating thing about 3D is the stupid glasses, so if they can come up with a working solution to do respectable 3D without glasses, and tie it into a Mario or a Zelda game or two, they’ll make their money back and then some.

Personally, I tend to skip every other generation of Nintendo’s handhelds — I bought a Game Boy, skipped the Color, bought the Advance, skipped the SP, bought the original DS Phat, skipped the Lite, and bought a DSi. I probably won’t count the XL, so I might skip the 3DS, but we’ll see — again, if Nintendo releases a beautiful Mario game tied to glasses-less 3D, I don’t know that I could really resist.

And speaking of Mario, @mockford wants to know: “I’m playing Super Mario Galaxy. When you did it, did you go back through as Luigi? I’m not there yet, but thinking about it. :)”

Wait, you can play SMG as Luigi? I thought that was a myth!

Holy crap you can!

I guess you need to collect all of the stars, which I don’t think I ever did. Right now I’m playing God of War III, and Final Fantasy XIII is supposed to show up sometime this week. After that, I’ve promised a friend that I will play Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10 with him, and then I think I need to go back and play through Uncharted 2 and Mass Effect 2. But if I get bored sometime during all of that, I’ll pull SMG out again and try to get to Luigi as a playable character.

Oh, and I’m back playing WoW again — I’m working on the Guardian of Cenarius title. Because I needed something to work on, and I need a cool title, and I happen to be playing on the Cenarius server.

Finally, @Ziphz asks the most disturbing question: “If turpster was a woman would you date him?”

Ah, no. A female Turpster wouldn’t be my type (although I do like an English accent), and plus, s/he’d be in England, and I’m not down for a long distance thing. Plus, you know, that smell.

Although if Turpster was a woman, I bet our podcast would be more popular. Two dudes chasing after Swedish ladies can probably only go so far on the Internet.

I’ve been playing God of War III. It looks good and all, and it’s a good game, but man, I’m having trouble lining up some of the combos in the right places. Oh, and Kratos is kind of a jerk.

P.S. I wrote this thinking it would be funny and then after I finished it, it wasn’t. I’m not sure if that’s because it’s not funny, or because I’ve just had it in my head too long. Either way, here you go. Not everything I do is as funny as I think it should be.

Kratos walks up the mountain, scowling angrily.

Hestia: Kratos, thank goodness you’re here! Poseidon is going nuts — you’ve got to stop him!

Poseidon: You’ll never be able to stop me, Kratos! The might of Olympus is all-powerful!

Kratos: We’ll see about that. I will have my revenge! (kills Poseidon)

Hestia: Thanks, Kratos! I appreciate it. Oh no, look out! It’s Apollo!

Apollo: You are mine now, Kratos! Your quest ends here!

Kratos: (kills Apollo)

Hestia: Whew, that was a close one. Thanks again, Kratos. So, uh, what do you think we should —

Kratos: (kills Hestia)

Hades: So, Kratos, I see you are short on loyalty. But I have a deal you won’t be able to turn away from. What would you say to —

Kratos: (kills Hades)

Dionysus: Don’t kill me, Kratos! I see now that the gods were wrong! We were wrong! I pledge my loyalty to you! Just please, save my life!

Kratos: (says nothing)

Dionysus: Oh crap. You’re going to kill me, aren’t —

Kratos: (kills Dionysus)

Zeus: KRATOS! I am here to end this madness! Your time has come!

Kratos: I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!

[They fight. Kratos kills Zeus.]

Hera: Whew. I’m glad all that’s over. So Kratos, how about we –

Kratos: (kills Hera)

Bowser: RRaaggghhh!

Kratos: (kills Bowser)

Toad: I’m sorry, Kratos, but your princess is in another –

Kratos: (kills Toad)

Highlander: Who are –

Kratos: (kills Highlander)

Punisher: Oh. You’re here. Well, this is awkward.

Xav de Matos and Kyle Horner, two bloggers that I’ve worked with at Joystiq and Massively, have this podcast they’re calling The Freelancers, all about being a freelance video games writer and what the life is like. They were kind enough to invite me on the last episode, and I showed up and talked way too much about myself, how I became a writer, and what I think all writers should do whenever they sit down to write (you know, besides actually write — though I said that too).

So if you want to get your daily dose of Schramm, you can run over and listen to that today. You’ll probably hear some things you’ve heard me say before, especially if you follow my every word (and if you do that, man, I apologize right now). But hopefully it’s entertaining, and especially if you’re a writer (or want to be one), you might find something that vibes with you in there.

I will also say that I was just joking, and I haven’t killed anybody (that I know of). But I think Xav will probably be a little more leary of me the next time we see each other at a video game convention.

Here’s the latest and greatest in what I’m interested in about Warcraft lately:

• Blizzard released official information for Gnomeregan and the Echo Isles. I’m excited — I guess. It seems like the lower level stuff in Cataclysm isn’t nearly as exciting as I thought. Sure, it’s cool to retake Gnomer, but I’m not quite as interested as I’d be if it represented actual progress for my character. Players want low-level content a lot — at least until they realize that it doesn’t actually help their high level characters. Blizzard’s challenge with all of the low-level stuff for Cataclysm will be to have it apply to high level characters in some way. Otherwise, I think people will log on to their low-level characters, and enjoy the lore, but be bummed that it’s not doing anything for their level 80s-85s.
• Here’s Massively’s roundup from GDC 2010, which doesn’t have anything to do with WoW, but man it was good to see Shawn and Sera there. They didn’t do any WoW coverage as far as I know (Blizzard did have a booth there, but they were just doing job stuff, not actual game demos), but the Massively crew are good people, and SW: TOR is probably the MMO I’m most excited about in, say, the next five years or so.
• I tend to agree — it surprises me a little bit, as I’ve actually purchased dual spec on all of my characters that can use it, but it actually seems pretty optional to me. Especially on a DPS character, there’s not necessarily a lot of call to do it. I think an epic mount is probably a better investment than dual spec in some cases. Which is interesting — we all though that dual spec would change the game, and it did for some players, but I think for the majority of players, it’s not that really a big deal. I would like to see what Blizzard has to say on this one. I wonder how many players who can take advantage of dual spec actually have. And how often people who have the option to change back and forth between two specs actually do.
• Some pretty cool fan art. I like the Blood Elf the best. I’ve been thinking that it’s probably about time that I get a Figureprint made, considering my interesting in the game seems to be on the wane. But we’ll see.
• A while after I said, look, let’s just need on Frozen Orbs, Blizzard decides that we’re greeding. Which is fine — I think need fits better, because we all need them, really, but my point was just that we have a standard. Better to have one way to do it than to have everyone guessing.
• I like this a lot better than sinking money into Blizzard’s plushies: Make your own. Plus, Blizzard doesn’t sell the Night Elf Druid plushie. That thing is great.
• I can’t remember who said it or where I saw it, but I agree: where’s our in-game St. Patrick’s Day holiday? Surely the Dwarves must have some saint that they celebrate by consuming a lot of alcohol, right?
• Finally, I tned to go with boneless chicken wings. I’m not sure why, but with a fork they’re not messy, they’re relatively healthy (well, unless you deep fry them, which I have to admit that I sometimes do), and they’re enough to keep you going even during a long raid. Chicken wings and beer for me — that’s the ideal.

That’s it! Thanks for reading!

Tyler Cowen posted ten books that have influenced his life over at Marginal Revolution, and he encouraged other bloggers to do the same. He doesn’t know me and I don’t know him, but it seemed like an interesting idea, and I needed something to write tonight. Note that these books are some of the influential books in my life, not the most influential or the best books I’ve ever read. Like Tyler, this is top-of-my-head stuff, not a definitive list.

1. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, by Douglas Adams. This book (and the subsequent “trilogy” of five books — I haven’t read “And Another Thing” yet, so I’m not sure if I consider it canon or not) defined my humor, my geekiness, my wit, my insight into our species and what a silly, messed-up set of creatures we are.

2. Dracula, by Bram Stoker. I bought an edition of this called “The Essential Dracula” back when I was a kid, and it got me into literary analysis long before I ever minored in English in college. Here was a pulp story about a supernatural villian told in an interesting way, but when I read the analysis on it, I realized it was actually a commentary on class and wealth, on Victorian sensibility and sex, and the proper modern balanced up against the great old evil myths of history.

3. The Dark Knight Returns, by Frank Miller. Batman was my favorite long before I read this book, but this series taught me about how you can deconstruct a legend, take it over, and place it in your own time. I remember reading that Miller wanted to write this because he was worried — Batman, to him, was always an old man figure, and Miller was rapidly approaching the age at which he imagined Batman had always been. So in this book, Miller pushes the clock back, and turns Batman into a guy who will always be the old grumpy bastard. Not to mention the Joker’s death scene — just a perfect ending to that mythical relationship.

4. Jennifer Government, by Max Barry. I found this book later than the other books on this list so far, but it’s one of my favorite books, and it’s the first book that really convinced me that I could sit down and write a novel. Not only is it a cracking good and funny read, but it was written by Barry while he was working at HP — in short, he was like me, a guy stuck in a tech job and trying to write fiction in the evenings about the geeky stuff he knew. I still haven’t come up with a premise or a book this good, but I am still working on it.

5. The Brothers Karamazov, by Fyodor Dostoevsky. My high school teacher told us that this was the best novel ever written, and though I didn’t believe her at first, I reread it a few years later, and eventually came around to her point of view. It’s not my favorite novel at all, but yes, in terms of voice and story and themes, it could well be the best novel ever written.

6. In the Hall of the Dragon King, Stephen R. Lawhead. There’s nothing really special about this book — it’s straight fantasy, with a kid who starts out humbly but eventually has to save the world with all of his magical buddies. But this was the first fantasy book I ever read, and so it was my introduction to the genre that I keep finding myself coming back to again and again. Nowadays, fantasy is super popular, and there are all sorts of subgenres and different takes, and it’s much more of a commodity. But this book hearkens back to when it all started for me: a little pudgy kid who was pretty unpopular who found all sorts of magical worlds and wonder in the pages of a book.

7. Snow Crash, by Neal Stephenson. As if you didn’t already know I was a nerd — it’s cliche to like this book at this point. But still, this was my introduction to cyberpunk. Nowadays, I think that The Diamond Age is a very much superior book, and I think Neuromancer should be much more respected for its influence and role in the creation of the genre. But Snow Crash was the first one I read that really vibed with me — Neuromancer was always a little too intellectual when you compared it to Hiro Protagonist’s pizza delivery adventures.

8. The Omnivore’s Dilemma by Michael Pollan. If you want to talk lifetime, this might not register quite yet, as it’s only in the past year or so that this book has influenced me. Still, if you want to talk quality over quantity, this book is more or less responsible for all the thinking I’ve done in the past year about what I’m eating and how I’m dealing with food in general. There are quite a few factors that have influenced my changes in lifestyle over the past 16 months or so, but this book is a big one of them.

9. Gamma World, 4th edition by James M. Ward and Gary Jaquet. I’ll come clean: my introduction to roleplaying games wasn’t through D&D. I never actually played D&D much as a kid — I was in that weird spot where the few friends I had were too cool to concern themselves with video games or D&D dice. But I did buy this book somewhere and I poured over it for hours, reading up on character creation and various weapons and how to design settings for players this postapocalyptic world. I only remember playing this once with my brother, and he didn’t have any interest in it at all (partly because I didn’t really understand it myself, but mostly because he didn’t really care), but I was so darn fascinated by the idea of it.

10. The Holy Bible. Let’s be honest here — I would almost argue that anyone who says they weren’t influenced by this one is lying. But even if you want to claim that this book isn’t a part of your life, I’ll admit that it’s been a big part of mine. I don’t mean to evangelize — personally, I have no real idea what exactly I believe right now, and that doesn’t give me any position to tell anyone else what they should or shouldn’t believe. I figure, as long as you’re not hurting yourself or someone else, more power to you. But from “In the beginning” to “Amen,” I would argue that there isn’t a part of anyone’s life this book hasn’t influenced in some way. You can talk about quotes, you can talk about story (almost all of our stories involve some sort of messianic figure, and who’s the most messianic figure you know?), you can talk about laws and politics and gender relations and wars, and you name it, this book’s had a hand in it. And even if you want to get personal, I went to a Lutheran school — I know all the stories of Jacob and Esau (oh hi Lost) and Isaiah and Solomon and David and Jesus and Peter and Paul and so on. Like it or not, if you want to list influential books, I’m putting this one on there.

That ended up being a pretty interesting exercise, actually. If you read this and end up posting your own list, feel free to send it along, I’d love to take a look.

The Census. It arrived in my mailbox this week, as it did for everyone else, and I’m kind of excited to fill it out. It’s the first one I’ve ever really been responsible for — I guess I was 19 last time the whole thing went down, and I don’t remember ever seeing a form. Plus, I’m actually excited to see the results. The country changes a lot in ten years, both in terms of demographic makeup and in terms of where everyone is living, so I’m interested to hear what the results turn out to be.

But first, I guess I have to do my part. Here goes.

The little letter they’ve included with it says that my answers are confidential, but I already see a place on the form to put my first and last name. I guess confidential means they know, but can’t tell anyone else.

“Start here” on the top of the form. Count all people living in your household. Does Batman count? No? How about my teddy bear Trent? Ok then, just me.

Actually, the form is asking about April 1st, 2010, and who knows — maybe I’ll meet a model and have a live-in girlfriend by then. I’ll assume not, though. Just one person lives here.

“Were there any additional people staying here that you did not include in Question 1?” That’s funny, actually — the whole point of the census is to count people, so I guess they’re just checking their math. “Ok, Mrs. Smith, we have you down for two people in this house. Now this may seem silly, but before we go, are there any other people that we need to count?” “We do have two children, do they count?” “Ah, yes, Mrs. Smith. We need to count them too. Good thing we asked.” I have no additional people living with me.

Is the house owned by me or rented? It’s rented, but I would like to know how the “occupied without payment of rent” option works. I didn’t see that checkbox on my lease when I signed it — if I had, I’d have done that!

They next ask my telephone number and my name. Like the government doesn’t know already — they could just check the signal from the chip they put in my head if they want to know all of that stuff!

I’m a male. I was born on May 6th.

They next ask if I’m of Hispanic origin. That’s weird — why don’t they also ask if I’m of Asian origin, or Nordic origin, or Indian origin? I guess they expect the majority of the country to be of Hispanic origin. Probably not too surprising. But I do wonder why they got or wanted to put that question first? I wonder how closely the constitution oversees the actual census questions — I know the whole process itself is dictated by the original document, but I don’t know who actually wrote out these questions.

I am marking myself as white. Technically, I am English/Irish, with a Lutheran background, a Midwestern suburban upbringing and a coastal California transplant. I’m educated, technical, fitter and stronger every day, and inquisitive. I like a good burrito, enjoy beauty, and can be overly sensitive at times. But “White” is good, too.

Does person one sometimes live or stay somewhere else? Again, they’ve already specified in the beginning that the census shouldn’t take note of anyone who doesn’t live in the house permanently (which, actually, is probably what happened to me back in 2000 — I was away at college, so I probably didn’t have to answer the census at all). But then again, this is America — they have to ask everything twice, because 1/4 of us don’t pay attention and 1/2 of us can’t really read anyway.

That’s it — piece of cake. Consider me represented, I’ll mail it out tomorrow. You’d think that I could have done it online, too, at some point, but on the other hand, I don’t mind the actual paper. I’m sure it costs ungodly amounts of money (I also got the letter that told you the actual census letter was coming soon, and that was stupid), but it makes things official. Plus, everybody can get mail. The numbers are probably way off anyway — making it easier for people online to answer the form would probably spin them even more.

I am so sorry, dear readers, but I am in San Francisco once again, this time for the Game Developers’ Conference, and I don’t have time this evening to write up a Warcraft Wednesday. My apologies.

In the meantime, please do listen to the Incredible Podcast if you haven’t already. You will, as I have previously stated, enjoy it.

Oh my ladies and gents, the Internet is a wonderful place for comics. All sorts of amazing artists who I never would have found on comic store shelves are working day and night to deliver week after week of strips (sometimes three a week! sometimes five!) that are touching and hilarious and extremely well done. I feel as though I should do something, anything to honor the hard work of these individuals, so I will do what I do best: blog about them.

This list does not include Hark! A Vagrant by Kate Beaton or The Abominable Charles Christopher by Karl Kerschl, not because they don’t belong here (they very much do), but because I’ve already interviewed them on this site before, Kate on the podcast, and Karl over here. Like all of the other comics on this list, please read them.

In no particular order:

-Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal: XKCD if Randall could draw more than stick figures. Gags, often scientific in nature, often geeky, and very funny. The SMBC Theater live action shorts are also extremely well done for a site of this stature, and extremely funny as well. It’s amazing that this site isn’t bigger than Collegehumor or that ilk — it’s certainly more creative and funnier.

-Dead Winter: Zombies, bad guys, and cute chicks. And that art style! It’s amazing how far he’s come, both in terms of storytelling and design, but then again, that’s what happens when you really commit to a webcomic like this. It’s amazing that this shows up for free in my RSS reader every few days.

-Questionable Content: What’s amazing about this comic is that the content is never questionable — despite the fact that it updates so often (five days a week, without fail), the comic is always super true to these characters, to their lives, and often funny anyway (though the humor always comes from who these guys are, not some contrived punchline). Great comic — more touching and true than most TV shows I watch.

-Sailor Twain or, The Mermaid in the Hudson: This one’s pretty new to me but the style is terrific. Moody and Victorian and dark and beautiful.

-Overcompensating: Ok, so sometimes I do like the silly non sequiturs. This one’s got them, along with some weird art, but I like it. And it makes me laugh, even though I often have no idea why.

-Dinosaur Comics: This is on the list? Actually, it shouldn’t be — I did interview Ryan North as well a little while back. But it’s recently come to my attention that some people I know aren’t reading their Dinosaur Comics every day, and so hopefully including this here will rectify that situation. This is the most useful and entertaining clip art in the entire history of the universe ever.

-Gunshow: I think I’m late on this but oh man, Gunshow. It’s the best. Sometimes it makes no sense, but then you think about it for a bit later that day and it both makes sense and is very funny. I am a pro at explaining things, and this one leaves me trying to figure out a way to explain why it’s so good. Read this arc and maybe you’ll see why.

-Dresden Codak: Weird. Beautiful. It doesn’t update as often as some of these others, but it doesn’t have to. Each one of these is a gem, and as you look at it, it’s as if you’re seeing the light hit an idea in various ways and reflections.

-The Non-adventures of Wonderella: I’ve been reading this one almost since the very beginning. Like The Venture Brothers, it both skewers the genre it’s parodying, and yet still offers up a surprisingly solid mythos and backstory. Plus, Jokerella is the most adorably incompetent supervillian ever. She tries so hard!

-Nedroid Picture Diary: Reginald and Beartato have such wacky adventures. Like this one. “You just don’t understand cats.”

-NPC Comic: Considering my audience, you probably already know about Mary Varn’s comic, since I’ve talked it up in a few places already. But even if you’re not a gamer or a geek, it’s a great read, and it’s been really fun to see the comic and the site come into its own.

-Lucy Knisley’s Artjournal: So honest, so beautiful, so perfect. Lucy doesn’t update that often, either (I think she’s spending most of her time doing actual work, which is as it should be), but when she does, it’s always amazing. I wish I could express myself and my thoughts with my words with as much vibrance and honesty as she does with her pictures.

I think that’s more than ten, but calling it eleven webcomics would mess up the title, and I wanted to mention them all. Enjoy.

So baseball and I have a weird history (as I’ve mentioned before). I used to be much more of a fan, in the way that every kid is — when you’re young, you need heroes and role models, and usually sports is a pretty good place to get those. My brother and I were big fans of Ozzie Smith and Brett Hull, not so much because we were good at baseball or because we knew how to play, but just because we knew who they were and had posters (that we’d gotten free from school or from my Dad’s work) with them on our walls. We liked them, sure — we knew Ozzie’s flips and we watched Hull and Oates skate on the ice at the St. Louis Arena — but we followed them because we were told to, not because we knew anything about them. When you’re a kid, that’s probably the best way to do it.

When you grow up, however, the foggy heroes of legend start to come into focus, and then you realize they’re just people, people with jobs and performance reviews and tempers and problems and so on. Not that they’re not great (nobody would argue that Hull and Ozzie weren’t greats), but they’re real, in a way you don’t realize when you’re a kid. I think the baseball strike was when I really started giving up on sports. I was still only 14, so I didn’t really understand the whole thing (and I still don’t, except that I can guess why any given strike tends to happen), but that was definitely the point that I remembered thinking sports weren’t that fun anymore. Coincidentally, that’s about when I started high school, where I joined the drama department, and figured out I wanted to work in broadcasting. So who knows — if baseball had never gone on strike, maybe I’d be a crazy jock dude instead of a guy who writes about tech and video games.

No, on second thought, I’d probably still be into the video games.

But this recent fascination with baseball for me is coming at a completely different angle. I’ve already explained (follow the link above) how I came to be a Cubs fan, despite living in St. Louis for so much of my life. But even then, I wasn’t sure if my “year with the Cubs” would be an ongoing thing, or just an in-the-moment experience. Watching all of those games last year could have just been a fad for me — I just happened to be living near Wrigley, I just happened to go to bars full of people discussing the games, and all of the team’s games just happened to be on my television. When baseball started up again (which is what’s happening this week in Arizona), would I still care? Or would I move on to follow something else?

If this week is any indication, I’ll still care. I’m surprised with myself — I’m pouring over news and rumors of who’s coming back with the team and what the lineup will be like, I’m following the old familiar faces on Twitter again, and I think I’m going to make the most serious investment in my baseball fandom yet: $100 to subscribe to the league’s Internet video service, which will offer me up video of all of this year’s baseball games in streaming HD whenever I want them. (I would kind of rather watch them on TV, but I think I’m going to hook my MacBook up to my TV with HDMI anyway, so hopefully I will get to watch the good Len and Bob broadcast in HD that way.) I’ve thrilled to the earliest news of the Cubs’ spring training games (we’ve won both so far — not that it matters, but I am excited anyway), and the thing I’m perhaps most excited about is that there’s every indication that my favorite player, Kosuke Fukudome (who I hear has been earning a great nickname around the clubhouse), is going to have a great year. He should, too — the Cubs could use it.

In other words, I’m in. I’m surprising even myself — I’m not a sports guy, and I don’t usually have the stamina to keep up with a whole season, much less start in on another one (my few attempts to join fantasy leagues usually have me forgetting to check the stats a week or two in). But for some reason, this is clicking with me now, and I’m really excited to be a fan again this year.

Why? It’s not the same as when I was a kid. Back then, I used to listen to Jack Buck with a reverence, and marvel at Ozzie and all of the other guys like they were larger than life. Nowadays, I feel much more equal. I know how a business works, and I know how the team works, and that they need to win X games to match a record, or X hits for a bonus. I know what the broadcast guys have been through during a long road trip, and I can hear what it’s like in their voices when they’re running on far too little sleep (because I’ve done the same thing myself). And sometimes I even feel more experienced than these guys, not in a bad way, but in a way that makes me realize what I’ve learned from my own life. Some of them are even younger than I am, and so when Zambrano throws a fit during a bad game, I think of the same kinds of frustrations I’ve dealt with in my life, and what might be the right way to deal with them.

The kid that was me didn’t think any of that stuff — he didn’t even realize, I think, that Hull was getting paid, or that he had a life outside of the rink (yes, like you were surprised when you saw your teacher at the grocery store). But the fact that I’ve learned so much about people, and that these young guys playing sports are real people, kind of makes me appreciate the whole circus more.

And to be honest, I have finally landed on one of the great truths of sports fanmanship — you feel good when your team wins. Sure, you feel bad when they lose (and c’mon, I chose the Cubs, I know what that feels like), but you could be having a terrible day when suddenly the bats start to light up, and your team wins by three. You step outside after that, and even though it’s raining and you’re in a hurry, you smile anyway. Because no matter what else happens, the Cubs won today.

Hey hey, Wednesday means it’s time for me to look at what interested me most in the World of Warcraft this past week. In case you missed it, here’s my episode of Polygamerous, and here’s The Incredible Podcast, a relatively new podcast that I’m doing with the T. It’s good, go listen.

• I like this Hearthstone pillow a lot. I bought a black leather couch just recently, and it seems a little plain without some Warcraft-related pillows on it. I don’t know when I’ll have the time or inclination to actually pick any up, but my birthday is coming up in early May. Also, I would have liked to see that mana strudel in a closeup. I wonder what mana actually tastes like.
• I actually wrote about World of Warcraft on Joystiq this week — Activision not only went nuts on Infinity Ward, but released their annual financial report, and WoW was mentioned quite a bit in there. It’s probably no surprise that Blizzard’s WoW subscriptions, and therefore revenue, are dropping pretty quickly. As I’ve said here before, Cataclysm is the key — if they can bring back that original swell of players by promising a return to the old glory days, they can probably get another few solid years out of this game, at least until Diablo III comes out. But if Cataclysm doesn’t attract enough attention or get players intrigued enough to come back (and bring their friends with them), then I think we’re looking at the long, slow end of the World of Warcraft. Not that it’s bad for Blizzard — this game is already legendary, obviously, and they’ve got StarCraft II and Diablo and plenty of other irons in the fire that haven’t even been announced yet. But if Cataclysm doesn’t explode for them, I don’t see the game growing any more, especially with threats like The Old Republic and all of the other games stealing free time in 2010.
• This is a pretty interesting discussion that’s been running through the blogs (you can follow all of Matticus’ links to see what people are saying there). I would say that if you get /gkicked from your guild for something that you blog about, then you probably shouldn’t be in that guild anyway. Remember, it’s a game — if something makes you angry enough to really rail on someone on your blog, then it’s probably not worth the effort. And if someone goes to the trouble of /gkicking you just because of something they read, again, it’s not worth the effort to stay with them. Of course, me and my guild almost never see each other these days — I tend to sign on late at night and tend to be one of the only players on — so you probably shouldn’t take my advice anyway. But I wouldn’t worry too much if you get /gkicked for something you write. Either you shouldn’t be there anyway, or it’s not your fault, it’s theirs.
• Facebook is still waiting for their Mario, Halo, or Sonic. This didn’t get reported on any of the WoW sites (that I know of — if you saw a WoW site that mentioned it, let me know, so I can start following them), but I think it’s intrinsic to what WoW was and is. Farmville, for all of its silliness and simplicity, is an extremely popular game, and in many ways, it’s the next World of Warcraft. It’s a game that’s pulling in people who aren’t game players, and that’s exactly why Warcraft got so big in the first place. For Facebook to say that they haven’t yet had their flagship game yet is kind of a big deal. When that game does come along, my guess is that it will dwarf what Blizzard has done with this game. Don’t believe me? How many players did World of Warcraft have at its peak? 12 million? Gee, that’s cute.
• There’s some whining going on about the “dumbing down” of stats in Cataclysm. Again, I don’t think that’s bad — Blizzard is going back to basics. The game has become complicated by necessity — to keep theorycrafters interested and keep the game mechanics solid, you naturally have to add a little complexity into the mix. But Cataclysm is the big return to the old days that Blizzard is trying to pull off. I’m looking forward to seeing if they can do it. I will say that they sound like they can, and the stat changes I’ve seen seem focused on making gear more straightforward, which makes it easier for everybody. But my big worry is if they’ll keep enough of the old world to remind people what early Warcraft was like — is it possible to create nostalgia by changing everything?
• Some cool desktop calendars to help you keep up on dates during March.
• It still surprises me that people wait so long to do instances. Seriously, they’re the best part of the game. Go do them!
• I saw this community team picture as well, and had the same thoughts (though you’ll have to go find it somewhere yourself. For a game with an audience that is so diverse and varied, I was a little surprised that the community team was still a bunch of dudes who look like they love to play CounterStrike. Not that there is anything wrong with dudes like that, but even on WoW Insider, we aimed to pick up writers that represented the community.
• Finally, I don’t have much to add to this, but I think it’s an interesting idea. Maybe the Facebook Mario game will do exactly that.

That is it! Happy raiding everybody — hope you’re enjoying all of your adventures, in and out of Warcraft.

I didn’t write anything yesterday because I spent the evening with the guys at the Polygamerous podcast. I will link up the mp3 here when they post is so you can listen if you want, but I’ll warn you now that it’s mostly about video games, and thus probably only interesting to somewhere around half of you, if my extremely informal demographic knowledge about readers of this blog is correct. But it does have lots of me talking, so if that’s the thing you like to listen to, you might even enjoy it.

And in the meantime, there’s also lots of me talking on the Incredible Podcast. Go listen to that and review/rate/subscribe the thing in iTunes if you haven’t yet as well. Please. I beg of you.

I ran my third 5k last Sunday, my first here in LA, over in Chinatown. I did pretty well, I think, but was probably a little overenthusiastic. Probably.

To: Michael Schramm
1523 XXXXXXXXXXX Ave.
West Los Angeles, CA 90025

From: Johnny Liu
Los Angeles Chinatown City Council
Los Angeles, CA 90313

Dear Mr. Schramm,

We are extremely pleased that you were able to attend our 32nd annual Firecracker 5/10k Run/Walk event this past Sunday. You certainly ran a respectable time, finishing the 3.1 mile course in just over half an hour, constantly running despite the multiple climbs we placed on the path from Chinatown up to Dodgers Stadium. We hope the event was fulfilling for you, and that you enjoyed your time in our historic and heritage-rich part of this great city.

However, we did want to bring up a few concerns with you in regard to your behavior at the race. While we make it a priority to make sure that everyone at our city’s events is able to enjoy themselves, we’re afraid that you seemed to do so to the detriment of our other guests’ experience.

For example, when you first showed up on Sunday morning, it was probably less than prudent for you to yell out, “All right I’m ready, let’s run this [expletive],” as you did upon arriving at the starting line. We spent a lot of time planning out a short opening ceremony, and both State Senator Carol Liu and special guest star James Hong were probably extremely disappointed when you suggested that they should “stuff this noise” because you were ready to “beat feet.” They were both too polite to say anything, but we could see it on their faces.

Likewise, once the race actually started, it was probably not appropriate that you proceeded to push not only women but also children out of your way in order to keep up your running pace. We are proud that you were able to hold such a solid pace (one of your personal best, we believe), but given that our event is clearly labeled as a “run/walk,” we don’t feel it’s right that you were so competitive. Mrs. Nancy Hodgson of Pasadena also shared with us that you asked her to “move it, Grandma” as you ran by, and we also agreed with her that it was considerably rude to do so.

We do admit that not all of your competitive spirit was directed at other participants of our race, but considering that there were in fact children on our run, we were troubled to hear that as you ran up the aforementioned course hills, you constantly berated our city’s geographic features. Telling our hills that you were “rocking” them “silly,” and that you were making them your “[expletive],” while admittedly true, was not the thing to do with young ears around. Likewise, asking our hills “what ya’ll think of that, [expletive]! That’s right!” after you’d crested the summit was not at all appropriate.

Finally, your behavior after the race was, in a word, shocking. If your interpretation of the Thriller dance after crossing the finish line had been slightly more accurate, we might have let it pass, but in its current state, we regret being there to see it. While your physical prowess is certainly significant, the women in attendance were made overly uncomfortable by your clumsy flexing and posing, and the table full of post-race smoothies that you overturned during your impromptu celebration had been set up by a group of volunteers who were very distraught to see their contribution destroyed in a short albeit spectacular flash.

In short, Mr. Schramm, while we do hope you are able to visit our city again, and we do hope to see you at the Firecracker run next year, you would do well to leave the competitiveness at home. We agree that you do indeed rock, but we sadly inform you that our Master of Ceremonies did not appreciate you grabbing his mic and saying so in front of the gathered crowd at the finish line.

Thank you,

Johnny Liu
Los Angeles Chinatown City Council
3/2/2010